...Or it was the car...stiff suspension sportscar over railroad tracks...yeah that's it...
What's a typical day like hanging out with a nude model, stripper, call girl, porn star? Boring...or not? W&H gives you the inside scoop, Gentle Readers... BEWARE!
I arrive early to drive for a morning counseling appointment with my beautiful Miss Lovely -- 2 weeks till baby due date.
BF is not working today... Dang, brought my vibrator and lube for nuthin!
Miss Lovely asks me to go ahead and wait in my car. I tell her to hurry, the appointment is in 20 minutes. Not far, but still, it's best to be early rather than late.
Here comes BF to the car...didn't know he was going, too. I unlock the door and he climbs in shotgun, not his usual bitchseat. First time for everything...
"Fuck this shit! It's starting again...I'm moving back to the trailer park!" BF bitches.
"Why, what's going on? We've got a doctors appointment in 15 minutes..." I bitch.
BF explains, "She's got a customer coming any minute."
"WTF?!!!" Oh shit, now I get a dose of what BF goes through while I'm fucking his GF...Karma is a bitch! Sure enough, a couple minutes later the customer pulls up in the parking lot.
"That's Gene," BF points out.
It's so fucking weird to watch him walk up the steps to MY girl's home...she opens her door and lets him in... Green Monster makes an appearance... FUCK.
"She's a drug fiend! It's all about the drugs," I point out the not-so-obvious. "If we can eliminate the addiction, problem solved, no more whoring or hooking."
"It's not her fault. She's been through too much." BF loves her.
"I agree, she's just a girl in over her head with addiction. As she says, it's a disease. I would never judge her. She's a better person than I'll ever be," I apologize. "I refused her demands for dope money last night..."
"She'll always get the money from somebody else," BF looks at his feet. "She's really fucked up. There's no way to stop her." Hopefully, she's not fucking to buy him drugs, again...
"We have to get her on opiate blockers ASAP," I attempt the impossible, too late. She says she fucked up, shoulda gone on subutex after her first detox rather than waste time clean in rehab. But that would make baby addicted requiring 1 month detox in hospital with morphine, BUT IT'S LEGAL... Dr. X warned her DETOX AND BEING CLEAN WILL PROBABLY KILL HER. She kept bravely trying to beat it on her own, but her demons are too powerfully embedded in her brain, heart and body. "I know she can't live without it. She has to self-medicate her anxiety disorder. I'll pay for her prescription, subutex or seboxone (are nearly 10 times as addictive as heroin or oxycodone), $200 a month. This appointment right now is a first step toward doing that."
I can't imagine what BF feels at a time like this...oh yes I can! That's OUR girl in there...
"She's too fucked up and needs help. I hope this counseling and nutrition and thyroid test works on her anxiety disorder from the rapes," I wish. Her urine test proved she has the disease of pyroluria, linked to anxiety disorder and addictions, cured by niacin vitamin B3 and B6 treatment. Too bad doctors, counselors and cops don't believe in nutrition. Too bad the U.S. Congress is trying to ban all vitamins without a doctor's prescription, as already done in Europe.
I sext her..."Get that dik out n lets go!" lol
She soon replies, "Be nice!"
15 minutes later Gene walks out the door with a sour expression and drives off. This is so fucking wierd! Twilight Zone material... Jealousy and pain for her remixed. The extreme pain she must feel inside, to have to do this to buy dope to numb her pain. Sex is great when you love someone (and they love you back), but this can't be that, can it?
Miss Lovely walks out the door and down to my car. BF gets out. No XOXO. No "I love yous." ML gets in my car, shuts the door as BF walks to visit a neighbor and probably smoke some weed to "relax" (a very bad idea with the current legal situation...).
I'm in shock, but trying to do my job and get her to counseling on time, or at all. Is this an attempt to sabotage herself by missing her first appointment? An attempt by an alter to prevent integration of her multiple personalities? Or just an addicted rapes victim trying to feel normal -- and loved -- again? Damn, I wish I could have sex as much as her! Shut up, watch and learn how to be a manho, you idiot...
Back on point! WTF do I say? She gave me zero warning. I need to be strong for her, non-judgmental, non-mental.
"Uh, good morning," I stutter a little. "I didn't realize you had a prior appointment?"
"Good morning," she says in the most detatched expression I've ever seen.
Miss Lovely looks cute in her pink sweatsuit I bought her. She seems to wear that alot. Should I take that as meaning something, besides that I need to buy her more outfits? Almost all of her $300,000 income from whoring went to her drug dealers (the new pimps). I start driving.
"So how was your date with Gene?"
"He's an asshole."
"How do you mean?"
"He asks me to do things I don't want to do, and I can be stubborn."
"Sexual things?" I stick my nose into her business, out of morbid curiosity, and friendship.
"He wants me to move in with him out of state." That's horrible! For me!
"He thinks he's in love with me, but it's only lust. He doesn't even know me."
He's a monster! "I can understand why he's in love with you, you're a very nice person. I've never seen you be angry with anyone, and that's a very unusual quality."
"He's still an asshole. He's married with young kids. I hate that he's putting that at risk. He just wants a mistress, all to himself in some cabin while he's working away from home."
"So why do you keep seeing him if you don't like being around him?" I ask rhetorically.
"I need the drugs to feel normal." Compromise EVERYTHING for extremely overpriced phamaceutical medications on the blackmarket. Sex slavery for dope slavery. Big Pharma is getting rich off the addicts, too.
"So how did the appointment go? It was awfully short!"
"Just a handjob," she explained. "We did it sitting on my bed. He was too freaked by my pregnancy, couldn't have sex. He didn't cum."
"Darn that's too bad," I laugh (and cry inside). He doesn't know what he's missing! Thank God. At least he loves her, a little.
I take her hand in mine as we drive. Her hand that just held another man's hard dick. She feels so soft and gentle. I feel zero anger...that's very strange! "She's just a friend," I keep telling myself.
"I love you...as a friend. I will never judge you. I know you need the drugs to feel normal, and that's the only way you can get them, for now."
"Hopefully these doctors can help?" Miss Lovely looks so lovely, like a little lost girl trying to find her way home.
We arrive. Time to navigate the palatial corridors of the outpatient loonybin.
Best defense is a good preemptive offense...MDs are the leading cause of death in USA, not counting MD's murder of 10-million babies every year in USA
We stand in line. WOW look at that hot Harley momma! A tall statuesque biker babe has brought her very young son for treatments. I'd like to take that lady for a ride! I, Man, Bear, Pig.
Miss Lovely signs in. FUCK THEY ASSIGNED HER A MALE COUNSELOR!!!! WTH???!!!
She's says, "No big deal, they said they'd fix it for the next appointment."
I sit with her in silence, offering her the stability of my impotent presence.
Once she goes to the back corridors with her young arrogant potential rapist, I give the desk girls a dose of reality.
"She needs a FEMALE counselor. She was previously raped and nearly murdered by a male counselor in rehab," I smile in controlled rage.
They calmly make a note in her records. Too calmly, I note.
She may have been violently raped and death-threated by female caregivers on many, many occasions, but the "men" did actual violence and attempted murders during their rapes, including a 3-day coma from the rehab counselor. She really needs a castrated eunich for a therapist.
She survived her male counselor, this time. Says she feels better. Only discussed the intake interview, no actual counseling. Good and bad for that. Says it will be 5 months before a psychiatrist can shrink her head with meds, with potentially deadly side effects. She made them note her prior diagnosis of anxiety disorder. VERY GOOD, for many reasons, medical, legal and financial.
Time for our next appointment of the day -- free food at a local charity. Her food stamps wont start until the end of the month. I'm doing everything I can to remove her financial anxiety so she won't have to fuck strange men (who love her) for food. We drive.
As usual, our conversations end up sexual. I like that about her. She seems most happy when that happens.
"So how many guys got you off in your working career?" I inquire.
"Very few even tried. Maybe 3 or 4."
"Out of hundreds?! Guys suck!" I smile and pretend to care, as if I don't.
"It wasn't hundreds," ML lies, probably. I see why she got so much repeat business. She explained the benefits of good sales technique, building rapport with customers, agressive followup sales, and doing anal -- 80% of customers wanted it, so she used bait-and-switch sales technique to get 'em in the notel door...but sometimes they raped her anally when she said no, then strangled her to unconsciousness and stole her money. Her 140 I.Q. took her far down the rabbit hole.
"Most guys are lazy and stupid," I complain that my competition is so easy to defeat on the battlefield of love. "You have to study sex, and work hard, to get good at it. Like anything else."
She gets her free food. Talks with the other MILFS. This is survival. Her parents certainly donated enough of their kids' money to this multi-billion-dollar church corporation/nation run by homosexual pedophiles.
Time to buy a fastfood lunch. She tells me her horrifying dream the night before. Her whole family was murdered. Damn! I record it with her permission. It's important?! This is a girl who refuses to watch any movie with a hint of horror...a typical reaction to someone who's seen real horrors. Beware the horrors of withdrawal from Roxicodone!
We bring a burger home to BF. He refused work today, for some reason. Depression? Withdrawal? Jealousy? Rage? At me?
We 3 laugh about no joy for Gene. Because it's no joy for BF too, these final few weeks before birth. But not for me...
"She don't tell me details," BF explained. He don't wanna know. I do. That's what significant others are for...
We joke about Miss Lovely moving to the Bunny Ranch in Vegas. Not a laughing matter!
"Yeah, I've thought about it," ML admits. "But it's dormatories, no BFs, no babies." No drugs. But it's LEGAL, as it should be everywhere, for the safety of the girls, and guys.
"BTW, BF don't like you calling me a whore," ML pouts in mock seriousness. "He prefers 'escort' or 'callgirl'."
"I apologize, I don't think you're a whore...it's a term of endearment!" BF denies reality. Miss Lovely uses that word all the time, with me...when fucking. And it's her favortite lyrics from the strip club and for fucking me.
"I think you're a good girl," I kid.
"ME a Good Girl?!"
"Yes, a Daddy's Girl."
"I mostly never had a daddy," ML pouts in pain. (Except for a convicted alcoholic stepdaddy who punched her in the bloody nose, driving her out of home at age 13.)
"You're a Wannabe Daddy's Girl." Or a Sugardaddy's Girl.
"I want to swap apartments with you. You can sleep here with BF. I need a break." From a BF who refuses to pay her bills, or his, or his kids', or allow other men to help her do so? Hmmm, perhaps I need to back off a little, let her crash n burn a little, or alot? But winners never quit and quitters never win...
Time to pay the piper and spend her hard-earned money...for the "last time" she promises. She says there's something calming about the needle, like when she was in so much pain and shutdown she cut herself to feel alive...a common symptom of dissociative identity disorder. First (and only) time I see BF shoot up with her. It's happytime in the shithole trailer park? He makes zero attempt to talk her out of it, nor admit she has to fuck other men to pay for his drugs, nor admit drugs kill his ability to earn money and provide for his family of abandoned kids. Denial is STRONG. Drug dealers...the new pimps, and slaveowners. She loves paying this bribe, so he won't leave her in Hell. What about me??? If I don't leave her, does that count, even if I escape from Hell dragging her (and him) with me?
We go babyshopping with her handjob $$$, and some family tythes. First time she's bought anything for baby, without my money. She spends less than $5. But I admit, she worked hard to earn that money, or at least worked on a hardon lol.
Food shopping. False labor pains so bad she can't walk. I find her a wheelchair. BF watches from the sidelines. SCORE.
Back to HER place (his name is not on the lease, he pays no rent, he's married to someone else). Hang out. Go home.
I text some PMA: "Thanx for starting dr today n free food n baby shop n makin me watch u give a crappy happy ending lol. i love u as a friend and god bless you and baby and maybe bf. And u are very beautiful for a preggy no matter what Gene the Asshole said."
I eat dinner, prep for jacuuzi. I get the sexts...
ML: "lol. wat u doin?"
W&H: "missin u"
ML: "wanna be bad one last time before baby?"
ML: "wen can u come?"
ML: "Why so late?"
W&H: "Unloading car, eating dinner and jacuuzi"
W&H: "Ok 8"
W&H: "glad u want me so bad lol." (SHE WANTS THE DRUGS SO BAD)
If not me, somebody else, perhaps somebody to rob, rape or kill her... There's no stopping her, for now... Hang in there. Wait for the opportunity...be there for her when she needs you most.
I pick her up for the second time today. I feel her pain, a little.
"BF turned down a blowjob today!"
"So that's a bribe? He preferred the dope?"
"Yeah. I only do it for a few minutes, then quit, ha. He don't like handjobs."
"Glad you don't do that with me. And I love your handjobs!"
No answer from her "dealer". It's dark. You don't wanna be knocking on doors out here in the dark, unexpected...
She's back quicker than normal. Her dealer was naked. Ha. Long story. This day just gets weirder and stranger. We drive back to my place and a date with a jacuuzi. We never make it to the jacuuzi.
W&H: "Dont label me a trigger when you quit, 'cause I will only buy shit you need if you want to avoid the temptation of holding cash. If I'm really a trigger then cut me out forever, but I'd rather stay in your life."
ML: "I do want you in my life. Out of all the guys I fuck at work, only 4 told me they love me."
"I understand why your customers fall in love with you, you have a nice personality, I've never seen you be mean to anyone. You actually smile when fucking me!"
"It's easier to be happy. A frown uses more muscles in your face than a smile. Gene is in lust not love (handjob guy today who begs her to move in with him out of state). You were the only one who didn't get carried way, saying you 'love me like a friend'. I love you like a friend. [emphasis added] I had a BF for 3 years (who got her hooked on heroin at 13) but he was an asshole (who fucked her mom, went to prison for dealing, now rehabiltated and married). I dont think I've ever been 'in love'."
"I've been in love and it always ended badly. I'm probably put off marriage after this latest disaster (alcoholic ex wife meeting ML is still too painful to blog, plus no sex with wife last 10 years of marriage). I need a GF or 3 or 4. I need a hot body to spend the night with. Do you mind if I fuck other girls?"
"That's so cool. (warning prolly a trick question since she only allows monogamy from a BF!) I only got you 3 nights this year. BF is lucky he gets you 362 days and nights a year. He should apprecieate every minute he gets with you...I do. I dont feel guilty. It's your apartment, not his."
"Not quite. We lived in separate trailers for a few months (drug risk for his kids). In a motel together except for tricks. I lived with sugargramps for 2 weeks." And she has BF on her infamous 1-fuck-per-week plan, a contract he agreed to as condition for his employment as house bitch, guaranteed to kill intimacy and love..... Miss Lovely and I have a LOT more sex than that!
LAST TIME: For Drugs and Sex Before Baby
I've heard that before...
We arrive. No shower play, can't get hair wet for BF to find out. It's our affair, not his. She's ready to go...
We strip. She's so beautiful, for a preggie! Thank you for teaching me that! I had no fucking idea...
She lies back on my 700-thread-clouds. I spread her legs and climb between them.
My trusty vibrator goes to work. Her shudders cannot lie. She gets closer...
"Tell me you love me...like a friend," I command.
(softly) "I love you, like a friend..." (she climaxes...)
We take a break, naked, in bed.
We discuss the New Rules for fucking in "BF's" apartment...I have to continually remind myself it's hers, not his-n-hers.
The Code Word, "BF is working." We need a better code word, since BF reads all her texts now...even texts answers to her texts pretending to be her...even refusing to give up her phone while singing along with his "pimp" songs (actual lyrics). Guess it beats working, for control of her life. Perhaps I should rename him PK -- Pimp Kidnapper?
I make the Standard Operating Mistake of Good Guys -- asking permission -- in theory, true for both Good Girls and Hookers.
"How do I know when it's a good time for you?" I play the pussywhipped.
"I want you to take me!"
FUCK! "Without asking?! Without payment?!" I'm shocked and honored. Doh...I've been doing it wrong all these years!
"How do I start it?"
"My back and inner thighs."
"No. And my boobies!"
"Wear shorts," I order her. "And shower before you text me. I want to fuck you cowgirl and doggie on your Daddy's couch. Then I want to fuck you in BF's bed, on that new comforter I got you. I want you to think of me when sleeping with BF under that comforter..."
Damn, that's an extra nice conversation. Time to FUCK.
Cowgirl, just the way she loves it. Her alarm goes off, I kill it. She keeps riding me.
As she starts cumming, I flip her doggie style, for an extra good pounding!
"Ohhhh I don't want it to stop......" she begs.
"I want to fuck you like this in BF's bed! We've already fucked many times in BF's bed at the notels. I want you to say something..."
"I love you like a friend... I love you like a friend... I love you like a friend..." she coos softly... She cums LOUDLY...providing much-needed entertainment for my neighbors lol.
No joy for me -- my ex wife broke my dick! Can't usually cum with a "short" time limit under 90 minutes. I'm just glad to make her happy, for a lil while. 3 guys fucked her today (or tried). All 3 struck out, no cum. A new record for Miss Lovely. Finally, for a change, and perhaps the first time in her life, she got her needs met, but her 3 customers didn't. Yes, BF is "just another customer..." It might not even be his baby...it might be brown...it might even be mine...
We drive her home to a furious BF...but..........
SHE CAN'T GET OUT OF THE CAR.
After a few minutes, slowly, she tries to stand but CAN'T...
BF walks to car, as we assess going to hospital for labor pains. We decide I must stay for possible evac to ER.
Once limping inside, she can't walk to the bathroom...
I wait for an hour until the pains stop, hanging out watching TV, after fucking "his" GF...HARD. Hey, she kept saying that's the best way to induce labor...
It was a strange and wonderful 12 hours with Miss Lovely...a typical day for her in many ways. An amazing day for her, in other ways. An amazing and agonizing day for me.
"See you tomorrow."
I drive home, alone.
He gets her, to himself. His celebate self... lol
SHE NEVER USED DRUGS AGAIN AFTER TODAY.......................
SHE NEVER WHORED HERSELF OUT AFTER TODAY.....................
I'm so honored to have been Miss Lovely's last and final customer of her career as a call girl! :-) (tear)
One month later:
"BF took 2 niacin 100mg and is red as a beet! Not for me...now my face is burning...how long does this shit last?"
"Ha ha. The niacin flush lasts about 30 minutes with instant release. Now you know that shit is POWERFUL. The extended release is more practical to take every day, that's what I do 500mg day. I tried 1000mg day instant release and thought I was gonna die, except I felt more alive than ever..."
-Whores & Hookers