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Knocked up in a strip club

Miss Lovely my fav preggie ex-callgirl/ stripper/ lesbian-pornstar and I went shopping for baby shit today. She looks fuckin HOT in her braless tubetop dress I bought her...

Got her signed up for a baby registry. BF thought it meant she got free shit from the store lol. Her rich family suggested she do it, so perhaps they're ready to stop treating her like shit and start helping her and her new baby survive this cruel world?

"Perhaps the walking will induce labor?" she hoped. The sooner the better, to get on prescription opiate blockers before the temptation becomes too strong.

Of course I volunteered to assist in that -- the orgasm-induced labor by hard-core fucking part, not chasing the dragon.

So she suggested we spend the evening soaking in a jacuzzi, and perhaps more. Like my famous 1-hour preggie massage and free oral orgasm, as she enjoyed earlier this week, hitting almost every labor triggerpoint known to man and woman, per her requests? My natural cure for anxiety disorder works better then Ambien, she admitted.

"Let me know when you go to Walmart first maybe get movie n hottub. Be good to walk more n maybe hottub will shake her up lol," she texted.

First I had to take care of some business earning money, to buy more babyshit apparently. I am her $lave?

In the evening, after our second round of babyshit shopping, time to head over to my place for a date with a hottub, and probably a whole lot more. After all, we have fucked in the hottub before.

The conversation kept returning to her days working the strip clubs we kept driving past between Chinamart and Toys-R-Fun and her "former" dope dealers.

Next thing you know, she wants to visit her old strip joint... The one where all the girls get high off the toilet seat in the ladies room... The one where she first started doin takeout UTR by blowin the DJ... The one with empty condom boxes in the restroom... The one with all the hot naked lesbians...

"Uhhhhh, okay," I said, of course.

I did the mental calculation at the speed of light...prolly no fucking tonight before her curfew with BF and his new free cellphone leash (courtesy W&H). Note to self -- get a real fuckin GF or 2 or 3 ASAP!

I inquired, "Are you a lesbian?"

"No!" she lied.

"Or do you mean bi?" I replied.


"But you orgasm with a hot girl licking your pussy, isn't that bi?"

"I don't do that myself, to a girl."

"Then how do you get a girl off when you do doubles?"

"I used a vibrator."

"I'd like to see that. We'll do that some time. And do a doubles massage date. With or without happy endings. So who do we get for the doubles, Miss A?"

"I'm very picky. That's who we hired for my BF double. But he couldn't get it up cuz the Roxys. Even with both of us working on him. So he watched us play. He didn't like it very much."

"At least it only cost him $2 in pills. Hookers are so easy!"

"She hot, but she does up to 15 Roxys a day. So she has to fuck all the time. She ripped me off once, so that's a No."

"So she's fucking 10, 15, 20 guys a day?!"

"Pretty much. Maybe 30. That's nasty. I never did that."

"I'm really glad you said that. I agree."

"OK." (big smiles)

"You know, I bet they won't let you in the club pregnant and ready to pop. Might scare the customers, and give the girls wholesome thoughts."

"Ha! No way!"

"Or they'll offer you a job. Would you take it?"

"Not now, not pregnant giving birth next week!"

"How about after the baby comes?"

"No, I'm done with that, can't do those long shifts till 4 am."

"Yeah, escorting is way easier."

"And more profitable. But I'm done with that too."

"Glad to hear it. Just fucking your last 5 regulars who are all in love with you."

No comment. (smile) Though the other regulars and BF are gettin blown out... Celebate BF can't take the "dating scene" clean and sober. Homicidal sugargramps can't take gettin flipped off by BF.

We arrive at the Big Bottom Bitches Club.

Fond memories are firing off in her clean and sober yet bizarrely beautiful brain. New deprograms are overwriting old brainwashing.

"Lots of memories here," she smiles. "The Christmas party was especially wild..."

"I was arrested here once," I replied. "Jail was not a great memory, but I did beat the cop and prosecutor in court."


I open doors for my girl friend, pay our price for admission. First time she's been here since turning 21...that's hot.

She picks a table in front of the stage, to get a better view of the hot naked chicks and their shaved pussies... Who am I to argue lol?

Club was empty. Girls prolly make their money off take out, like my preggie friend quickly learned how to do.

"I got my ass smacked alot here."

"Probably by the management."


"Trying to have sex with you and the other girls."

"I never did that. Though I did blow the DJ once, after I quit. He was a client."

"Takeout is easy to get, according to some on the local sex forums."

"I didn't even know about the sex forum while stripping. A photographer client for my nude modeling first told me about it, and how to get started in UTR."

Sitting on the front row, I volunteer my time and $1s to each lucky lady, in between massaging my preggie's backache from walking the malls. Amazing how much friendlier the girls are with my new wingwoman. Lots of baby comments.

One especially hot lady takes it off and spreads her legs and bounces her 6" heels off the floor over her head. What do I see but a clit ring. As she accepts my gratuity I ask her if it hurt?

"Not the labia it's just 3 thin folds of skin. The nipple rings hurt like hell!"

My preggie asked what I asked?

"None of your business, just a personal question," I teased.


Explained the clit ring thing.

"Seems like that would hurt during sex," I asked the sexpert.

"It's supposed to make it more intense," said the lady who got a lickin from a guy with a vibrating tounge ring. "Did you notice hers glows in the dark?"

"Uhhhh, no I didn't. But you sure did!"

My play date had 7 years professional dance training and competitions, plus her cheerleading years. But even she was amazed by some of the new dancer moves. In 30 years of stripclubbing, I've never seen a girl bounce her stillettos off a ceiling before.

"I can't wait for you to dance for me! I wanna see what a real lapdance feels like," I enthuse.

"After the baby, you can count on it," she smiles.

"I'll be installing a stripper pole in my house soon. You can use it for your fitness workouts." Not kidding.

Only one girl was still working from my preggie's days in the club over a year ago. I told her she made my friend hot, because she said she did. Hottie came over to talk trash and baby shit. Don't think she liked the lesbian compliment, but you never know... My friend said she was done with stripping, but was enjoying the show.

An extra sexy song is banging from the sound system. "You're such a dirty fucking whore" are about the only lyrics.

"I really like that song!" she admits with disturbing enthusiasm. "Sounds like Lords of Acid."

"Ok, you're a dirty fucking whore," I play the game.

"I'm not a whore!" she pouts.

"You told me to call you that when I'm fucking you," I pout back.

"That's the only time you can say it!"


(anyone know the name of that fucking whore song? I want to fuck her to it ASAP! ANSWER: Fuckmachine by Combichrist !)

"I've never seen a preggie in a strip club. Never thought I'd ever bring a preggie to a strip club! Guess that's another mark off the bucket list."

She rubs her cute belly, then guides my hand to feel her daughter kicking to the beats.

"She's dancing!" she smiled.

"Will you let your daughter grow up to be a stripper?"

"No way!"

"Hypocrit! So this is the first and last time you let her in a strip club?"

"Well, I can't say what she does when she turns 18..."

"You gonna call the cops to kidnap her out of a strip club, like your momma did to you?"

"Ha! No."

"That must've been quite the scene. Wish I'd been there!"

Time for my preggie to saunter over the the bar and get a cold beverage from her former boss. I covertly eye her conversation with the mobster, er, entrepreneur. He pretended to remember her, and admired her gigantic belly yet incredibly hot body. She alleged he never offered her a job, nor did she ask for one.

"I want a regular job," she promised (which depends entirely upon how good a job we do playing the detox/ rehab/ counseling/ subutex/ MPD-deprogramming/ free-govt-safety-net/ sugardaddy-with-bottomless-pockets game).

"You can get a real job, then come here when you want to play. Just like ordinary folk."


After a full round of hotties stripping for her and me, we head home. Lots of angry texts from the BF on his new toy. Ha.

We make a late-night stop at the market for more free food for my preggie and her significant others.

"Were you turned on by the naked ladies at the club," I ask, because I can literally smell her wet cunt from across the parking lot.

"No..." she lied.

My turned on hottie is quite the attention whore, just minding her own business. While standing in line at checkout, two roided-out cops check her out, then promptly knock over an entire display of stacked consumables. The piggies scramble to clean up their slop. She has that effect upon a lot of men.

As we pull in to her home, BF is waiting impatiently. Tough job he's got, but at least he (usually) gets her all night and half the day. Not a bad deal for a former deadbeat. Too bad they're 99% bored together when straight (he lacks my skilz set).

We carry in her loot.

"Seven days clean. Let's go to church tomorrow!" my preggie begs with glee.

What a goddamn refreshing attitude from my hot little-big friend!

An addiction-survival church congregation. With whores, strippers, escorts and porn stars...same as any other church.

Sure beats the hell out of expensive drug runs. I'm so proud of her, and proud of being with her. Now it's just expensive shopping sprees and blowing leftovers on other naked womenz. Woe is me lol!


by Combichrist

You're such a dirty whore
You're such a dirty whore
You're such a fucking slut
You're a filthy slut

You are my fuck toy
You are a fucking toy

You get what you deserve

It's fucking beautiful

Whore Lyrics - In This Moment

I'm the girl you've been thinking about
The one thing you can't live without
I'm the girl you've been waiting for
I'll have you down on your knees, I'll have you begging for more
You probably thought I wouldn't get this far, you thought I'd end up in the back of a car
You probably thought that I'd never escape, I'd be a rat in a cage, I'd be a slave to this place
You don't know how hard I fought to survive, waking up alone when I was left to die
You don't know about this life I've led, all these roads I've walked, all these tears I've bled

So how can this be, you're praying to me
There's a look in your eyes, I know just what that means
I can be, I can be your everything

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner, I am your whore
But let me tell you something, baby
You love me for everything you hate me for
I'm the one that you need and fear, now that you're hooked it's all becoming clear
That all your judgments that you placed on me was a reflection of discovery
So maybe next time when you cast your stones from the shadows of the dark unknown
You will crawl up from your hiding place, take a look in the mirror, see the truth in your face

So how can this be, you're praying to me
There's a look in your eyes, I know just what that means
I can be, I can be your everything

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner, I am your whore
But let me tell you something, baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner, I am your whore
But let me tell you something, baby
(Scream) You love me, you want me, you need me

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner, I am your whore
But let me tell you something, baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

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