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When good hos go bad

"I want to take a vacation in a loonybin. Will you come with me?"
-Ho addict to Whores & Hookers after her second dope run of the day after being robbed during her first dope run and losing all her work profit, again

My ATF UTR called me today jonesing for a payday loan to make her dealer(s) rich. It's humbling to face the reality that most of these girls don't do it for the dick, they do it for the dope, even when the dope makes it nearly impossible to orgasm and enjoy the sex (hence the timer?). I was all tapped out for the loan, meaning she'll have to put out to god-knows-what to get the cash. Deadbeat BF can't provide for her money needs, and her usual UTR customers are likewise tapped out. Can Capn Fuck-A-Ho cure her addiction, and return her to her Good Girl supermodel roots? At least this addict actually wants to get better, unlike so many others, with many (quack) rehab "vacations" to the loonybin to prove it.



2011 Ho Survey prefers doggie

When Good Girls Go Bad

Dating Research: Maxim Magazine

The bottom line of this article is:

That many women go through a, "slut" phase. During this period (which may come and go) they want to behave like men and explore a lot of no-strings sex. This may be a reaction to getting dumped or dumping a boring guy. Heck, they may still be seeing the boring guy but for one night, they want something more.

This girl really does not care about your bank account, she wants to know, in no uncertain terms, that you think she is hot and have the balls to do something about it. This girl will call your bluff, so be prepared. Can you really pick up a total stranger and take her home to your bed? It can be a bit intimidating when she says, "yes", be ready to follow through.

So how can you recognize this girl when you see her? Look for a combination of rebellion and provocation. This might mean sexy provocative clothes, but short hair. And this girl will not be hanging around waiting to be asked to dance. She is already out there. Move close, make eye contact and smile. Maybe she will drag you out onto the floor with her. It could be the first step to a memorable evening.

Maxim reveals super-secret dating trick: you’re not sending her enough pictures of your penis

Lifestyle, Local
July 24, 2013

LOS ANGELES, CA – In a new video launched on the magazine’s website, Maxim “Helpful Hottie” Jessica Chaves finally revealed the most highly effective dating tip that the fairer gender had cleverly withheld: an unannounced photo of your phallus sent right to her cell phone is an unparalleled way to spur her interest.

“No way you’re getting a second date if you haven’t texted me a picture of your veiny erection!” said the Hometown Hotties finalist. “The ‘in’ guys figure this out very quickly, but I know a lot of you shyer guys out there probably hadn’t even thought of this and almost no one ever does it, so it’s worth a shot” she added.

Chaves went on to note that, although the tactic seems perhaps a little aggressive, a confident press of “send” with an unshaking finger to your romantic interest “speaks volumes to your status as a man and potential provider.”

Yale anthropologists discovered that cavemen had great reproductive success with stencils like these.

This revelation is not just corroborated by Ms. Chaves’ personal experience, but also by academic research. A Yale anthropology study recently released in Nature noted that the males who were most successful in propagating their genes in the Paleolithic era were known for stenciling the outline of their penis onto a rock with paint or chalk and delivering the “dick pic” to the most attractive female in sight.

The Helpful Hottie concluded: “You never know what could happen if you just seize the day next time you have a boner; my gorgeous friend Amanda was single for so long, but then some adorkable guy on the subway asked for her number, stuffed his phone down his pants, and sent her the picture right then and there. They were happily married two months later!”


Cobra Starship: Good Girls Go Bad

Songwriters: Saporta, Gabe / Rudolph, Kevin / Kasher, Jay / Dioguardi, Kara

I make them good girls go bad
I make them good girls go
Good girls go bad
Good girls go bad

I know your type
(Your type)
You're daddy's little girl
Just take a bite
(One bite)
Let me shake up your world
'Cause just one night couldn't be so wrong
I'm gonna make you lose control

She was so shy
Till I drove her wild

I make them good girls go bad
I make them good girls go bad
You were hanging in the corner
With your five best friends
You heard that I was trouble
But you couldn't resist
I make them good girls go bad
I make them good girls go
Good girls go bad, bad, bad
Good girls go bad, bad, bad
Good girls go

I know your type
(Your type)
Boy, you're dangerous
Yeah, you're that guy
(That guy)
I'd be stupid to trust
But just one night couldn't be so wrong
You make me wanna lose control

She was so shy
Till I drove her wild

I make them good girls go bad
I make them good girls go bad
I was hanging in the corner
With my five best friends
I heard that you were trouble
But I couldn't resist
I make them good girls go bad
I make them good girls go
Good girls go bad, bad, bad
Good girls go bad, bad, bad
Good girls go bad

Oh, she got away with the boys in the place
Treat 'em like they don't stand a chance
And he got away with the girls in the back
Acting like they're too hot to dance
Yeah, she got away with the boys in the place
Treat 'em like they don't stand a chance
And he got away with the girls in the back
Acting like they're too hot to dance

I make them good girls go bad
(They don't stand a chance)
I make them good girls go
The good girls go bad, yeah
Good girls go bad
I was hanging in the corner
With my five best friends
I thought that you were trouble
But I couldn't resist
I make them good girls go bad
I make them good girls go bad
I make them good girls go
Good girls go bad, bad, bad
Good girls go bad, bad, bad
Good girls go


Cobra Starship: Prostitution Is The World's Oldest Profession (And I, Dear Madame, Am A Professional a/k/a When Good Boys Go Gay)

Do you know who i am?
good, neither do i.
got nothing to say, (i got nothing to say)
but if you pay me, i can play the fool.

go on believe, if it turns you on.
take what you need 'til your body is numb.
prostitution, is revolution.
you can hate me, after you pay me.
my submission, is your addiction.
so just get out while you can.

do you remember when the only thing that mattered was, taking time for the things you love?
but now you got to humor, all these fools.

go on believe, if it turns you on.
take what you need 'til your body is numb.
prostitution, is revolution.
you can hate me, after you pay me.
my submission, is your addiction.
so just get out while you can.

if you need me, i'm your man.
but you don't want to see me mad.
oh, no, we, don't care!
you're a pro and its no surprise.
oh, no, we, don't care!

go on believe, if it turns you on.
take what you need 'til your body is numb.
prostitution, is revolution.
you can hate me, after you pay me.
my submission, is your addiction.
so just get out while you can


It’s Easy To Identify A Slut

December 29, 2008 by CH

Women seem to think that men are too thickheaded and inattentive to identify which of them are cockgobbling cumguzzling sluts. Or they prefer to believe their sly poses of innocence and white lies are good enough to keep men in the dark about their sexual histories. They would be wrong. The dirty little secret is out: Men have finely tuned straydar for slutty women because they are the ones more likely to cheat. Women lie more about their sexual pasts to men and to themselves, or otherwise expend great effort covering it up, because they know that men will downgrade them as potential long term mates if their sluttiness were revealed in all its jizz-spackled bukkaked glory.

Here is a list of tramp tells:

She broaches the subject of sex first.

The more explicitly she talks about sex before you’ve banged her, the likelier she has a storied slutty past.

She suggests kinky sex acts.

If you’ve been dating a short while and she eagerly implores you for public sex before the glow of bedroom missionary sex has worn off, you’ve got a slut.

She’s neurotic and disagreeable.

Emotionally flighty girls are vaginally flighty girls. They are ruled by their vaginas. If she’s the gossipy, backstabbing, conniving sort who drips with sarcasm and generally disdains everyone around her, you can bet her black soul will seek sustenance on a carousel of cock.

She frequently goes commando.

Yeah, as guys, we think it’s hot when we slide our hands under our girlfriends’ dresses during dinner in a fancy restaurant and discover a panty-less pussy waiting for us, but what if you notice she’s sans underwear while you’re both shopping in Whole Foods? At a family picnic? In church? On a ferris wheel? In a glass elevator? You get the picture.

She’s got that crazy, hyper, coked-up look in her eyes.

Welcome to attention whore land! Chicks who can’t breathe without being the center of attention are chicks who are unable to control their craving for fresh cock. You want to be on the lookout for manic depressives and girls who can’t make it through a ten minute conversation without screeching in phony excitement.

She shows a lot of cleavage all the time.

No worries if she’s accentuating her tits on the first date to entice you, but if she’s got those colliding death stars displayed for the world to admire every time you’re out with her, you’ve got a woman on your hands who is addicted to advertising herself. And there will be buyers, oh yes!

She *really* seems to know what she’s doing in bed.

Hey man, nothing like getting a BJ from a chick who knows how to hit the underside with her tongue, but it does make you wonder how much dick it required for her to reach that level of professionalism.

She has an impressive collection of vibrators and admits to wacking off to porn.

She’s a high testosterone sex fiend (sign of a psychopath) who values sexual novelty more than pair bonding. This type of girl is a creature of her id. High T girls are easy to spot. Check for forearm hair, narrow hips, broad shoulders, a penchant for cursing, a flat ass (adjusted for race), career ambition, and status whoring. (Not a "Quality Girl")

She asks you how many women you’ve slept with or accuses you of being a player.

One word: projection.

She seems “hard”.

If she’s got that tough, tankgrrl aura about her, like she’s been through dating hell and back, and her cynicism is worse than yours, you know she’s been used like a cheap whore.

She’s incredibly circumspect or incredibly forthcoming about her past or sex in general.

In the course of a few dates, occasionally the conversation turns to past loves or sexual experiences, or views on men and women and the dating scene. Normally, these exchanges are blessedly brief and act as useful springboards for other topics, but when she seems like she’s hiding something big you’ve got a right to be suspicious. Listen for tells that give the game away. Stuff like “Oh well, we all have our skeletons”. Or “I’ve learned so much growing up.” Or “Men are pigs.” (The last one usually said by a record breaking slut.) Naturally, you want to write off any girl as GF material who brags about her CRAZY and WILD college years. Believe me, those years included more than college.

She’s an artsy type.

Or a lawyer. See: How To Handle Femmes Fatales Part 1, Part 2: Eternal Ingenue and Part 3: Amazonian Alpha. The paradox of femininity is that it is often both the ultrafeminine and ultramasculine women who have racked up big numbers of men.

She tells you about all the places she’s traveled.

Yeah, chicks love to travel, but how many have put their dreams into action? If your date has been around the world twice with multiple stops in Rome, Rio, Vegas, LA, or some Appalachian backwater you can be sure she’s “traveled” straight into the crotch of an exotic local at every destination.

She never has a break between men longer than one week.

If she’s the type who can’t stand to be single and monkey swings from one man to the next, sometimes with sperm-sharing overlap, odds are high she’s a slut.

You’re tapping her for the first time and she doesn’t remind you to put on a condom.

We men have an excellent fallback system for flushing out the sluts. If we think you’ve been around, we act as if we’re going to rawdog you, only to reach for the condom at the last possible second. If you haven’t reminded us to put one on during the long pre-penetration buildup, and it looks like you’d have been OK taking our unwrapped meat, we have all the evidence we need that you’re a skank.

She never stops shit testing you.

A girl who is constantly testing you for alpha congruency is a girl who would jump to another man the moment you betatize yourself. Worthy girls keep the shit testing to a bare minimum. Turn on your love light, baby.

She buys you a lot of gifts.

I’m not sure why this is a leading indicator of sluttiness, but in my experience it is. Especially if she showers you with little gifts early in the relationship. I open the floor to a discussion of theories for this particular observation.

She’s OK with making out in bars.

Self-explanatory.

She lets you snort coke off her ass.

Oh yeah, big time slut.

She’s black.

Sorry, folks, hate to say it, but going by my personal experience and what I’ve heard from friends, black chicks seem to sleep around more. Don’t blame me, I’m just the Deliverer Of Truths Best Left Unsaid But I’m Going To Say Anyhow.

She has a lot of slutty friends.

Ye shall know her by her support group.

Her cunt is cavernous.

Some of you wonder if this is an urban legend or a frat boy joke, but it’s got a kernel of truth. If you feel big with most girls, but small with her (and she doesn’t have the excuse of being a seacow), she has a stretched out pussy that has happily accommodated a parade of giant cocks. Why do you think Kegels are all the rage with the city slutterati? Chicks are onto the fact that their distended pussies betray their loose ways, and anything to tighten up that love hole helps them hide their pecker pounded tracks. When I feel humongous with a girl, I know she has a normal sized snatch that hasn’t been used like the town orifice. The more I feel like I’m ripping her insides to shreds, the likelier I am to move her to the front of my cherished girlfriend queue.

Your gut tells you she may be a slut.

Always go with your gut. It will almost never lead you astray.

****

A lot of guys, particularly artsy fartsy greater beta males whose agenda is to ingratiate themselves to women with a fawning act of white knighting nonjudgmentalism drivel, believe that it is wrong to categorize women by sluttiness, let alone to disqualify them as relationship candidates based on how many hot loads to the face they took over the course of their sexually active lifetimes. “Don’t judge!” is the rallying cry of weak women and lickspittle betas and lesser alphas everywhere. Conveniently forgotten in this social stampede to shame male standards out of existence is the fact that judgement is inherent to human nature. The frontlines of judging eyes are everywhere. We all do it, including those who judge others for exercising their judgement. If sluttiness were just another lifestyle choice with no implications, there would not be a stigma attached to the word, nor a concerted effort to enforce compliance with the equalist world order by the guardians of female prerogative and pushers of beta male submission howling with inflamed passion at the injustice of men who dare to promote less promiscuous women at the expense of sluts for the best of their masculine love and attention.

Note: As a tactical matter, it’s recommended to refrain from being judgemental of the sexual history of girls you are gaming. Naturally, you don’t want to deep six a budding romance before you’ve closed the deal. There will be plenty of time post-sex for you to take a measure of the girl’s sluttiness and screen her for lesser or greater commitment. I think this goes without saying, but apparently there are some commenters who believe being completely nonjudgemental of anything a woman does is the mark of an alpha. In fact, it’s just the opposite. Only alphas have the market value to mercilessly judge the women they choose to bring into their lives.

Men subconsciously judge women’s sluttiness for eminently practical reasons, just as women judge men on a host of alpha benchmarks for similarly practical reasons. No moral equation required. “Slut” is, in fact, a morally neutral term in the context of the sexual market, where a slutty girl is viewed, justifiably, desirably as an easy lay who will go all the way right away, and undesirably as a girlfriend or wife prospect in whom to invest precious resources. With the law and social institutions of the modern west arrayed against male interest as it hasn’t been in all of human history, it is of critical importance that men get this part of choosing girls for long term investmest and wife and mother potential down to a science. Mandatory paternity testing will aid them in this, and I predict such testing will seismically shift the playing field in a way we haven’t seen since the introduction of the pill and widespread use of the condom. While most married men are not soulkilled by cuckoldry, it only takes a radical change at the margins to have a huge effect on the behaviors of the whole.

For those of you new to the Wonderworks that is Poon, don’t bother bitching ineffectually like a wind-up Jezebel lezbot about “double standards“. They are a fact of deeply ingrained sex differences, and aren’t going anywhere. No one said life was fair.

Maxim #41: The more experience you have with women, the more you’ll know which women have experience with men.

Corollary to #41: It is the inexperienced beta male who is most often in the dark about a woman’s sexual history and liable to be victimized by the cheating slut.

The median number of sex partners for American women is 3(!). The average is 8.6. This means that there is a group of super slutty women, let’s call them “girls who live in the big blue coastal cities and work in marketing or PR”, who are shifting the average higher for all women. By these numbers, it is fair to conclude that a woman who has had more than the median number of partners is a candidate for slut designation, and the higher her number the sluttier she is.

0 lifetime partners: Sweet virginal manna. A bit weird, but you’re confident you’ll break her in.
3 lifetime partners: Typical woman. Wife and mother of your children material.
10 lifetime partners: Above average. Proceed with caution.
15 lifetime partners: Well above average. Be dominant or she’ll cheat.
25 lifetime partners: A whole lot. Use her and lose her.
100 lifetime partners: Stopwatch material. You wonder how fast you can get her from “Hi” to “Spread your ass cheeks, I’m going in”.

I suspect that overall female sluttiness (actual penis in vagina sluttiness, not sluttiness as defined by proxy fashion trends) has increased slightly over the past 40 years, with the blue state city chicks fucking around more than ever and the red state religious girls fucking around less. It goes without saying that only the top 20% of men are enjoying the emergent slut bounty.

What men think about sluts, illustrated:

646 Responses:

I believe it has to do with some sense of reciprocity. When she’s screwing around, she views the gifts as a form of compensation that morally justifies her behavior. One might also see it as a sort of hooker/pimp relationship. Pimps are essentially men who allow their “girls” to sleep with other men in return for financial compensation. Pimping is professional cuckoldry.

I love whores!


CYA: Don’t Stop Thinking About The Next Pussy, er, Girl

November 14, 2007 by CH

A big mistake guys make when they start dating a girl they really like — the “one” — is neglecting to continue going out and getting fresh leads. I used to do this, so I know the mental processes that go through a guy’s head when he’s really into a girl he’s dating. He channels all his pickup energy into this one girl, figuring that if he made it as far as a first or a second date he should focus like a laser beam on her pants zipper. He spends the long days in between seeing her analyzing his progress, picking apart the meaning behind her actions (or inactions), and daydreaming about what a relationship would be like with her. When he goes out, he gets lazy and tells himself there is no urgency to collect new numbers since he’s already dating a quality chick and most of the other girls can’t compare anyhow.

This is a sexually lethal frame of mind to put oneself in. When a guy completely boxes himself in like this with no options to fall back on, all it takes is a change of heart by his golden girl to crush his soul and send him spiraling into morose self-examination. It’s like investing your whole wad in a biotech startup with huge promise only to see it crash to a sub-penny stock after the CEO is convicted of fraud. You’d have been a lot better off diversifying your portfolio in a range of pussy sectors.

As an example, once, during the course of a month, I had four second dates in a row fizzle out on me leading to no sex. I made a critical error by jumping from one girl to the next – dating, failing, getting a new lead, dating again, failing again, etc. My desperation and self-doubt grew with each new girl, practically ensuring failure.

The way to beat this crippling dating handicap is to follow the “two in the kitty” rule religiously. You should date a minimum of two girls simultaneously until you have locked in your preferred girl by having sex with her at least three times. I have found through trial and error that a girl will bond to you after the third bang. Before that, it’s a crapshoot and depends on the girl’s innate femininity. Because modern girls have taken on male characteristics (especially DC girls who are more masculine than girls from less ambitious or overeducated towns) and are sluttier than past generations, the first or second bang won’t guarantee emotional attachment. By the third bang, however, you will notice a very perceptible shift in the balance of power. Suddenly, she will call and text you first, ask about your weekend schedule, tell you to “give me a call soon”, start doing favors for you, cuddle longer, and generally betray signs of nervousness when you make yourself physically or emotionally scarce.

That is when you will have her in the palm of your hand and can steer the relationship in the direction you want it to go.

A guy can achieve this if he adheres to these fundamental principles:

1.Other girls CAN compare. Girls are more interchangeable than you’d think. Don’t get sucked into “oneitis”.

2.If you date one girl exclusively and she really turns you on, you WILL give off a needy vibe at some point during the pre-sex seduction no matter how much experience you have. The best players who have ice running through their veins and cyborgian state control get that way because they date and fuck many girls concurrently.

3.A good date means nothing. The only thing that matters is penis in vagina, and even then a feeling of security is not assured until the penis has penetrated the vagina on at least three different occasions. (Three times in one night does not count.)

4.You will find it easier to close the deal with your number one girl if you are banging a number two and three girl. A man getting regular sex has an aura that girls subconsciously register in their hindbrains. Don’t ask me how this happens, but it does. The Aura is very powerful, like the chemical hormones secreted by ants and bees to get them to cooperate as a social structure, and will be your Valkyrie in the battle for pussy.

5.Approach the game while dating as ardently as you do when you are dating no one. If you have a date Tuesday, go out Monday and Wednesday and get more numbers. Even if you fail at getting numbers, just taking the initiative of meeting new girls and chatting them up will reduce the neediness you feel with your date.

6.Never, EVER, feel guilty for dating and banging many girls simultaneously. The mating marketplace is a battlefield and the Genitalia Convention rules of engagement clearly stipulate that it’s open season for fucking around until terms of exclusivity are tendered. This is not your mother’s dating environment.

7.A hot chick is MORE likely, not less, to continue seeing you if you tell her you are “dating around”. A guy who knows he has options and is in fact exercising those options is extremely attractive to a girl.

Don’t give a girl the chance to pull the rug out from under you. Have another ten rugs underneath that one and you will glide through your interactions with women like a shark through a school of mackerel.

The Slut Test -- The Results ARE IN! You are 80% Slut (Manho)


Prostitution Playlist


Maxim model fought desperately in her final moments alive to try and stop 'female James Bond hired to kill her' court hearing as murder case opens

Jurors in Los Angeles heard this week how a beautiful 21-year-old model and actress discovered strangled in her Santa Monica apartment battled for her life.

Juliana Redding was found dead in March 2008 and prosecutors believe she was killed by Kelly Soo Park, described as the 'James Bond' style enforcer of a shady doctor who has since fled the United States.

Redding's mother broke down in tears as Los Angeles County Deputy Dist. Atty. Stacy Okun-Wiese showed jurors photographs of Redding's body taken after her death.

'Juliana Redding spent the last moments of her life literally fighting to save herself,' Okun-Wiese told the jury. 'Juliana Redding tried to fight off a woman. A woman she did not know.... A woman who needs to be held accountable for her actions.'

The first officer on the scene also described the gruesome scene inside the apartment where prosecutors believe Park stangled Redding with her bare hands - then turned on the gas stove and lit candles, hoping to cause an explosion.

Park, 47, is alleged to have worked as an enforcer for a Dr. Munir Uwaydah and the physician dated Redding, a cover girl for Maxim magazine, for a time.

During that time, Uwaydah attempted to go into business with her father, Greg, an Arizona pharmacist.

continued...


Hot femfatal assassin can bust your balls and eat them for lunch -- FOR REAL

Cheerleader sex

I'm out of town on business and I've got this awesome hotel suite. So big...it's lonely. Shame to waste it...

Time to hit the wifi with the iPod. A little web search for sex services turns up a highly rated "UTR". Should I or shouldn't I? Would I rather have a new TV and DVD player, or be a player on TV?

Petite 5' tall 95 lb 21-year-old spinner...cheerleader. SCORE!

I have fond memories of the cheerleader squad riding home with me after my MVP basketball game. Took a detour down a back country road. Parked in the dark. Climbed into the back seat of my Camaro. 3 on 1, my kinda odds! The girls took turns rewarding me for my performance...

BACK TO THE FUTURE

I text the #, ask if she wants to play? She texts back a photo, nice view of her doggiestyle. I compliment her ass. She highballs me on a price. I counteroffer. Too low. I offer her what I got for 15 minutes lol. She declines. I say goodnight maybe another time, too rich for my blood. She texts back a friendly non-blowoff. I counter with "I've got $XXX for whatever time that may be." She says she's OTW.

Shit, I didn't expect her to actually agree to my 50% lowball! Rush to shower and shave. Knock knock. Damn she was close, already here!

I greet her wearing only my crotchless boxers, invite her inside. Hot little thing!

We hug. She asks for a cop check. I strip for her. She gasps at my growing cock, grabbing my shaved shaft. "That's a big one!" "Yeah, I get a lot of giggles about that."

She strips. Perky little tits like a teenage cheerleader should have.

Nice ass, slim legs, a few tats. Team Bad Gurl.

She drops to her knees and begins sucking my cock. "I get a lot of comments saying it's the biggest they've seen, Asians say it's too big to fuck, American girls say it too big to DT." She promptly DTs me (pics to prove it!), though her teeth can't open wide enough. Feels GOOD.

Her turn. I pull her to the bed and lay her on her belly for a full-body massage. "I love to touch a woman." She responds with a purr. Flip.

I kneel between her bent legs and massage her perky breasts. GFE kiss. Clit massage, with BB dick. She cums loudly.

I slide it in slowly as she wimpers, "You really know what you're doing!"

Mish with DFK and boob suckage. Another loud orgasm.

Doggie style. Perfect fit. Perfect timing. More orgasms.

Long story short, she had six orgasms in 60 minutes of fucking. She kept ignoring her cellphone alarm then her BF began calling incessantly. She was practically crying that she wanted to stay and keep on fucking, like a petulant little girl. Adorable!

As are the XXX photos of our Cheerleader Experience.

VIRGIN HOOKER

Her 15-year-old virgin hooker story was also "adorable", deflowered by a 37-year-old army colonel pedo. At least he did it "right", orgasm included (as was the felony). Not many women get a happy ending first time, putting them off sex, perhaps forever. She was on her own, no family, had to pay the bills. Ain't that Amerika? Hope she gets her Happy Ending with a real Prince Charming some day, rather than 10,000 ogres.

Her porn star videos are available for sale...


First Time Hooker by casualmafia

You might be a ho if you want sex with 100,000 men

I think I'll pass on this one. But good for her loving men and sex.

Ania Lisewska, Polish Woman, Wants To Have Sex With 100,000 Men

The Huffington Post
By David Moye
08/29/2013

It's good to have a goal in life, but the one purportedly expressed by a woman in Warsaw, Poland, may be a stretch.

Ania Lisewska, 21, is allegedly attempting to travel to every city in the world so she can have sex with at least 100,000 men for 20 minutes each.

"I want men from Poland, Europe and all around the world. I love sex, fun and men," she said, according to the Austrian Times. "In Poland the subject of sex is still taboo and anyone who wants to fulfill their sexual fantasies is considered a deviant, a whore or mentally ill."

The supposed sex marathon allegedly began last month in Warsaw, according to her Facebook page, and she hopes to have her way across Poland before moving to other countries.

So far, she's had sex with 284 men, according to Fakt.pl and didn't let the fact she has a serious boyfriend stop her.

He told the Polish language website he was "not thrilled" with her unusual hobby, but had no choice and "had to come to terms" with it.

Her Facebook page currently only has slightly more than 9,000 likes, but Lisewska is allegedly attempting to attract potential partners by setting up a website where they can register and kept apprised of her current activities.

The story raises eyebrows for a number of reasons. First, Lisewska's website isn't working properly except for the front page.

In addition, she has not responded to media requests.

Then there is the nature of the quest itself. Having sex with 100,000 people for 20 minutes each would take a person more than 3.8 years -- and that's only if they went at it day and night without breaks for sleep, food or personal hygiene.

Lisewska claims she is planning her sexual encounters to take place on weekends, which would stretch out the time frame considerably -- up to nearly 20 years, according to one Polish website.

Another reason to be skeptical: Many of the media stories about Lisewska suggest she is attempting to get her erotic efforts recognized by Guinness World Records. The organization has never adjudicated sexually-oriented records.

Lisewska is now claiming to be the victim of foul play on her Facebook page. She claims it was hacked by someone who posted she had AIDS, which she denied by posting test results on the page.

Sext images sent to wrong people by Android freaks

Just when you think, "I've never had so much fun with a telephone or camera, what a great idea to merge the two...hey my phone is covered in pussyjuice...COOL!"

The following nightmares have NOT been fixed as of Summer 2013, because they happened to me this week. Selfie porn (MMS images) of females with O-face sexted to family members is never a good thing!!! Thanks to Amazon for selling this POS without a warning label that it cannot be trusted to send sacred text messages. At least I hadn't sent the hardcore XXX yet! You'd think Rep Anthony Weiner would've been all over legisation to fix this -- guess he's too busy sexting his penis to teen interns again.


Android still has horrible text messaging bugs that'll get you fired, busted, or otherwise embarrassed

By Chris Ziegler posted Dec 31st, 2010

Pardon us if the headline is a little sensational, but this is one that we've personally experienced -- and it's not pretty. For at least the last couple versions, Android has been plagued with a couple extremely serious bugs in its text messaging subsystem that can ultimately end up causing you to text the wrong contact -- even contacts that you've never texted before. There appear to be a few failure modes; the one we definitely experience on the Gingerbread-powered Nexus S involves being routed to the wrong thread when you tap it either in the Notifications list or the master thread list in the Messaging application, so if you don't notice, you'll end up firing a message to the wrong person.

More seriously, though, there's also an open issue in Android's bug tracking system -- inexplicably marked "medium" priority -- where sent text messages can appear to be in the correct thread and still end up being sent to another contact altogether. In other words, unless you pull up the Message Details screen after the fact, you might not even know the grievous act you've committed until your boss, significant other, or best friend -- make that former best friend -- texts you back. There seem to have been some attempts on Google's part over the year to fix it; we can't confirm that it still happens in 2.3, but for what it's worth, the issue hasn't been marked resolved in Google Code... and it was opened some six months ago.

This is akin to an alarm clock that occasionally won't go off (we've been there) or a car that randomly won't let you turn the steering wheel -- you simply cannot have a phone that you can't trust to communicate with the right people. It's a deal-breaker. We're pretty shocked that these issues weren't tied up and blasted to all affected phones as an over-the-air patch months ago, but whatever the reason, we'd like to see Google, manufacturers, and carriers drop every other Android update they're working on and make sure this is completely resolved immediately.

Want to see this fixed as much as we do? Scroll to the bottom of the Google Code page and hit "Vote for this issue and get email change notifications."

Update: So Google's changed the priority of the bug to "critical," which we'd say is a solid start. They're also asking people to simply star the bug rather than commenting on it -- unless you've got constructive information to add that might help them reproduce the problem, of course. Thanks, everyone!

Comments: 20 PAGES OF COMMENTS BY IRATE ANDROID VICTIMS


Bug in Android SMS system sending messages to random contacts

by Dustin Karnes on Dec 31st 2010

Well, well, well… this is certainly interesting. According to the Android developers forum, there is a bug in the Android SMS system that may end up sending your text messages to random contacts in your address book. The issue, apparently, has been ongoing for the past 6 months or so, and is being listed by the development team as a “priority: medium” issue. It looks like the issue, specifically, is that you compose a message, and tell Android to send it to contact A, but the system will send it instead to a random contact.

Be sure to hit the break for a log of these issues. Have you had any problems like this? Be sure to let us know in the comments.

Jun 28, 2010:

Device: Nexus One. One day old. Updated to 2.2 FRF50

Default Android Messaging Application.
No apps installed.

Messaging.
- Send SMS message to RecipientA.
- Message appears to be successfully sent to RecipientA.
- RecipientX receives message.
- ‘View Message Details’ in RecipientA thread, shows ‘To’ field as being RecipientX’s MSISDN (phone number).

Has occurred multiple times on this device now.

Interestingly, has never occured on my other Nexus running the same FRF50 build.

Jul 09, 2010:

This just occurred again on FRF91. Suck.

SMS was sent to recipient who there had been no contact with and no threads in messaging.

Sep 13, 2010:

This issue is way more widespread than what is respresented here, please review the comments at this page, where users are very detailed in reporting the issues they are experiencing.

My personal experiences:

Text being sent to unintended recipient, when responding to an existing conversation(text). Unintended recipient is NOT someone I have ever sent a text to previously. The 2 contacts in question do not have any similarities in the digits of their numbers, other than the area code.

I have 763 messages in my inbox, 782 in the outbox

Galaxy S 2.1-update 1

Sep 15, 2010:

Cross posting with my post from the Google Help Forums:

My steps to replicate are as below. Seems to be pretty consistent that the message sent in step 09 will go to a random contact; in my limited testing, it usually goes to the number involved at steps 05 and 06.

01) Stop Messaging App.
02) Clear Messaging App data
03) Access messaging app, send messages.
04) Establish messages were sent to correct addresses.
05) Send message to a number not in your contacts.
06) Reply from the number not in your contacts (I haven’t established if this is a required step yet)
07) Read reply, don’t delete thread.
08) Send SMS to your device, from another device that is in your contacts.
09) Reply to SMS.
10) Check message details of your sent message.
11) Repeat steps 08-10 a couple of times.
A factor in this, is I think it might only be short numbers that cause this issue.
I’m using my banks automated SMS service (880).

This would explain why it happens when people have facebook/twitter SMS notifications enabled.

I’ll debug it all properly on the weekend when I have some time.

Oct 05, 2010:

This issue is listed as “Priority-Medium”, I think this is totally wrong. For a phone send messages to the wrong person may be very harmful to the user as a human. This just means the phone cannot be trusted anymore. How to bump up the priority?

Oct 05, 2010:

I have experienced this problem a few times. And I do not have facebook or twitter on my phone either. It’s actually a relatively new phone (Samsung Vibrant). To list this issue as “medium” is a gross understatement. This is much worse than iphone’s drop call problem. And there is no pattern in picking the wrong recipient. I actually think it’s an OS lag issue. Last time it happened I caught it before it sent the SMS (because in my SMS window I saw the wrong recipient showing on top, while I was in a thread window with someone else) and I let the phone sit for a few minutes. When I went back to my thread window, the correct recipient name was at the top once again.

Dec 23, 2010:

Android Phones Play “Chat-Roulette” With Your Text Messages I have always been a big fan of Google Android phones. Sure the user interface may not be as polished as the iPhone. I admit the Exchange support might not be as tightly integrated as it is on the Blackberry. But, I’m a geek and I’m willing to put up with some annoyances as a trade-off for speed and flexibility and customization. And I’m not alone. Market researchers Canalys and NPD Group both recently published reports stating Android was running on > 40% of all smart phones in the United States. It would seem Android is destined for dominance. Except somewhere along the way, Google seems to have forgotten first and foremost Android phones need to be phones. And that is why I’m seriously considering making the move to Blackberry or Windows Phone 7. For the last six months now I’ve been dealing with a huge flaw that makes my phone unusable for SMS texting. From what I’ve been able to tell using analytics provided by Google’s developer site, as many as 77% of Android phone users are at risk of having their text messages sent to a random contact. That sounds unlikely right? I mean you pay upwards of $200 for a smart phone, and next to making phone calls, sending SMS text messages is probably the most used feature of the phone. But it’s true, and if you don’t believe me just type “android SMS wrong contact” into Google’s search engine and see how many hits you get. It’s astounding. It’s happening. And Google seems to be ignoring it altogether. The first time I responded to a text message from recipient A, and it went to recipient B, I just wrote it off to user error. I was in a hurry. I fat fingered it. Who knows, right? In time though I’ve begun to qualify and quantify this serious bug and disaster waiting to happen. The worst part is you don’t even know your text message went to the wrong person until you get a call or new message from someone in your contact list asking “what was that last message all about?” On the sender’s phone, the text message actually shows as sent to the correct recipient, yet I’ve been able to get all three parties with their phones to sit down in one room and verify that in fact the intended recipient did not receive my text, and a random contact did. I will put up with a lot of minor issues for a cool phone, but having my privacy threatened is not one of them. What irks me the most is that owners of these phones, me included, have no recourse. The bug is part of the core operating system, and has been since Android 2.1, (though it seems worse with 2.2). Phone model doesn’t matter. Using a third-party SMS application won’t help. Contact your phone carrier and you will be told to do a factory reset then call the phone manufacturer. Contact the manufacturer and you will be told to do a factory reset then get in touch with your carrier. This is a flaw with Google’s code so how is it they managed to slip out of the support loop altogether? Ah, I think now we have reached the heart of the problem haven’t we? By making it an open source solution, Google isn’t really accountable. Or are they? I guess that depends on you and me. Google has a vested interest in fixing any flaws that are impacting their continued effort for world smart phone dominance. If those of us who have made this platform so successful for them draw a line in the sand perhaps someone at Google will take notice. The issue at hand has been logged in the Google forums for some time now. Sadly, it’s rated as only having a priority of “medium” and I’ve yet to see anyone from Google comment on the current state. I would urge any of you who have Android phones to log into the Google forum and star the issue. The link is here: http://code.google.com/p/android/issues/detail?id=9392. In the mean time, I’m going to continue evaluating some of the new Windows phone offerings. Just in case Google decides new UI bounce effects on widgets are more important than where my SMS text messages end up.

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Captain Fuck-A-Ho

"I want to take a vacation in a loonybin. Will you come with me?"
-Ho addict to Whores & Hookers after her second dope run of the day after being robbed during her first dope run and losing all her work profit, again

FYI CYA...and why would you want to destroy a Good Thang? Just pay da bitch and fuck her as much as you want! Or pimp her out, one way or another. Then dump her for the next Young Thang. Plug and Play. Word. (But if you want to tip her afterwards with food, vitamins, clothing, beauty appointments, taxi service, household items, employment contracts, assist with government benefits like free food and free housing, buy her lube so her deadbeat BF won't rub her raw before your appointments -- anything that theoretically can't be pawned for dope -- then more power to you.)

"When the Lord first spoke through Hosea, the Lord said to Hosea, 'Go, take to yourself a wife of whoredom and have dchildren of whoredom, for the land commits great whoredom by forsaking the Lord.' So he went and took Gomer, the daughter of Diblaim, and she conceived and bore him a son. And the Lord said to him, 'Call his name Jezreel, for in just a little while I will punish the house of Jehu for the blood of Jezreel, and I will put an end to the kingdom of the house of Israel. And on that day I will break the bow of Israel iin the Valley of Jezreel.' She conceived again and bore a daughter. And the Lord said to him, 'Call her name No Mercy, for I will no more have mercy on the house of Israel, to forgive them at all. And the Lord said to me, 'Go again, love a woman who is loved by another man and is an adulteress, even as the Lord loves the children of Israel, though they turn to other gods and love cakes of raisins.' So I bought her for fifteen shekels of silver and a homer and a lethech1 of barley. And I said to her, 'You must dwell as mine for many days. You shall not play the whore, or belong to another man; so will I also be to you. My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge; because you have rejected knowledge, I reject you.'"
-Hosea 1-4, Christian Bible

Ho.
Abreviated: 'ho' (hooker) for Hosea
-Whores & Hookers Suburban Dictionary

captain save a hoe
Derived from a 1993 rap song by rapper E-40 about the adventures of a Financial savior to underpriviledged inner city hood rats.
A golddigger's dream. A man that will drop dimes on you (i.e. get your hair and nails done, take care of your childroes, pay your bills)
A man that does this is usually Captain Savin'
Look up in the sky, it's a bird, it's plane!
Wus that foolz name
Captain Save A Hoe man
The phrase was popularized by from that e-40 song to refer to a dude that plays the role. buy girls shit, gives them money and eats the box execively. Mean while she uses his ass for all that shit. Dude falls in love to soon. shit like that
"Its a bird its a plane what is that niggas name captain save a hoe, hey" -E-40-
or
The guys keeps buying flowers for that girl he just meet. What a Captain save a hoe mother fucker
A hope dreaming, good nature, and god fearing individual who goes through thick and thin to save a Hoe from the sins they have indulged in.
Jay: I love her to death, my heart belongs to her and I can see my life going places with her. I just want her to see that her past should be left behind, and she should start a new life with a man who actually cares. I know she done some things, but she can be forgiven.
Tyler: ....I know you not trying to save-a-hoe.
-Urban Dictionary

[Hook: E-40 and 'Hoes']
Ah is a, Ah is a, Should I save her?
I want to be saved!!!!

[B-Legit] It's 1993 and niggas need to miss me be savin' these hoes
You know how these tricks we be buyin' 'em clothes
Wanna taxi hoes on vogues with the beat
And have 'em sittin' next to 'em in the front seat
But not B see I'm a hog up out the V
And my motto is fuck a ho and hit the throttle
To the smoke talkin' on my Okie doe
World wide I got a clydes up in Tokyo

[E-40]
Look up in the sky it's a bird it's a plane
What's that nigga's name?
Captain save a ho, mayne!
More faster than a speeding bullet
To put on his cape and scared
I put the fake the fake the funk the funk
To me that's not the way to do it
Captain muthafuckin' Save a Ho game to me
Flexin just like a little ol' bitch
All up in front of my company
Had to check his ass with an ear check dump and pumpin'
Talkin' to him while I'm beatin' his ass
Pumpin' fear talkin' bout nigga you gone retrospect somethin here

[Hook: E-40 and 'Hoes']
Ah is a, Ah is a, Should I save her?
I want to be saved!!!!

[D-Shot]
Mr. super trick Mr. super snitch
Yeah, you wanna kill me cuz I fucked ya bitch
You should've had your cape on tight that night
Cuz a nigga like the Shot sho plugs 'em right
And now yo bitch is straight callin' me lovin' me
On the under for the porno star that I be
And don't you come in my face with that trick shit
You better try some more shit

[E-40]
I got the gift to grab any bitch
That I want but I don't
Cuz bitches now a days will get you caught up in some funk
Oh no, I'm not tryin' to save you hoes 'n
How come when I was broke you wasn't brown nosin'?
The other day you see me smobbin' down magazines
With some ol' nigga in your car lookin' at me mean
I stopped in the middle of the street
Reached under seat to grab my heat
Man that's the same motherfucker
That I got into it with at the club last week

[B-Legit]
Man them niggas can't fade
They bith made
And so they start
But niggas with no heart
Don't want no part to this
Nigga rollin' with the Funk Mobb
And when it's funk
The pump will spit them double laws
So what you doin' when we roll through you hideout
I let my mack get off and then I rides out
With your ass there smokin' like an incent
You savin' hoes nigga and that's bitch shit

[Hook: E-40 and 'Hoes']
Ah is a, Ah is a, Should I save her?
I want to be saved!!!!

[Suga-T]
I'm crossin' up niggas and bitches
And even snitches just for my riches
Captain Save A Ho
I ain't got no problem with that ol shit
I gives a damn as long as he's payin'
It ain't my fault because he's sprung off my land
I'm cashin' GA checks, go to the bank Hank
If your breath stank, you get ganked main
Long as a trick comes fallin' down
That gets me all upset to put on my suit and clown

[E-40]
But make that nigga take care your kids
Make that nigga call your kids his
Make that nigga get out there and work
Make his ass buy you a Brinun Burk
It's all part of that nigga take care of me
Pussy whipped nigga come save me
Bitches out there be on the look out
For Captain save a ho
Cuz he's savin hoes

[Hook: E-40 and 'Hoes'] x4
Ah is a, Ah is a, Should I save her?
I want to be saved!!!!

I want to be saved!!!! (x4)

[Captain Save a Ho]
Fuck that what they talkin' about
I save a ho yeah
Yeah baby, what's up you wanna get your hair done
Come on let's go down to Lee and Kim Nail's
We can get your nails done, get your hair done
What about your kids? How many kids you got? Two?
Ah, yeah that's cool we can go feed and clothe them kids
We can go down and get the hook up at Durant Square
Yeah baby I do anything for ya
Want you phone cranked on, I can get it cranked on to my name
Matter of fact I'll get you a cellular phone and a pager
We can get that package deal down there at Cellular One
Baby I'm here for you I got you


The Harsh Truth: Why Men Love To "Save" Promiscuous Women

BT Tabatha McGurr
Complex.com

Growing up, I was always told by voices of reason that there was no such thing as “turning a hoe into a housewife,” but it’s amazing how many dudes are willing to put their pride and ego aside in hopes of rescuing the ideal woman. This sort of thing happens to ladies all the time—we come across a guy with an insatiable sexual appetite and mysterious persona and suddenly want to be the one to change him. Sadly, all girls in said circumstance have realized the hard way: you can’t change someone set in their ways. The same thing happens to men when they spot that prized female with the extensive track record and try to throw limitations on her. Cuffing doesn’t exist in the world of Captain Save-a-Hoe’s. If you’ve been guilty of falling for these types or know someone in a similar situation, here are a few reasons why men are constantly on the prowl for the promiscuous...

YOU LISTEN TO TOO MUCH DRAKE

Life isn’t a fucking song on the Take Care album. Aubrey might have some of you dudes fooled into thinking that exclusivity with an in-demand dime is possible, but that doesn’t mean you can trick that broad into feeling the same way. Hot women aren’t oblivious to their appearance—they know they look good and that guys want them, so seeing all of the different offers come along is like a fun waiting game. The majority of decent girls will go for whichever dude seems the sweetest or most genuine, but there’s definitely a select few out there just waiting for an opportunity to prey and hustle on your ass. Some guys might actually convince these chicks to put their wild ways aside and temporarily settle for simpler lives spent decorating the house or going on couples dates, but we know how that tends to turn out. It’s the story of Sam Rothstein and Ginger in a nutshell.

INSECURITY IS A MOTHERFUCKER

If you’re searching for someone you can “save,” then you’re in need of some salvation yourself. One huge reason to seek out someone “flawed” or with a crazy past is so you can feel superior to them and mask your own issues with theirs. We usually hope to find people that bring us positivity and enrich us, so looking to rescue a girl with tons of emotional baggage means there’s something wrong with you. It’s like coming to the aid of a wounded animal and then keeping it captive in return. Guys act like they’re helping the girl out, encouraging her to divulge her secrets and demons only to reproach her for it in the end. Once they gain trust and have her fully wifed up, they can easily hold those insecurities against her, bringing up all that past shit that they know hurts her the most. It’s a way of gaining total mental control over a woman, and that’s how toxic ass love stories are formed. One person holds all the power so that every time the other wants to leave, they’re made to feel worthless on their own. So while I don’t doubt that legit romances can form between two individuals in such a situation, it’s definitely impossible to be equals in a relationship where someone considers them self to be your savior.

NO CUFFING IN THE CHAMPAGNE ROOM

Guys that think they can land a stripper evoke laughs of pity from me, not even because there’s a million other women to choose from who don’t strip for money, but simply because they actually think these girls want to be with them. The only guys that a stripper is seriously fucking with are rappers and other high-profile type dudes, not some desperate ass John who spends every one of his paychecks in the champagne room. Sure, she might let you drive her home and buy her expensive shit, maybe even hit it if you’re lucky, but none of that is going down without financial reciprocation anyway, so what’s the point? It seems impossible for such fools to roam this earth, but I legitimately knew a kid so whipped by a dancer that he started buying her flowers on the daily, and then tried convincing her to quit and come stay with him. He claimed that she was “different and listened,” but no shit dude, of course she’s listening when your wallet bulge is bigger than your boner. Unless you like the thrill of getting played and having all your money taken, leave these ladies to the professionals.

YOU'RE ASSERTING THE ALPHA MALE STRUCTURE

Some men are all about showing power through the display of exclusive shit: fancy clothes, flashy gadgets, and unattainable women. Like a hunter, they’ll find the chick that every dude at the club wants just to be able to say that she’s off the market, but any relationship based on appearances is bogus. These types of guys entice chicks with the allure of materialistic shit and someone to confide in, and then bring them out to parties and events where they’re shown off like prized little status boosters. They don’t call ‘em Trophy Wives for nothing. Initially, it seems like a win/win because the dude is happy that he gets to flex and show his chick off while she gets her little ego trip from being put on display, but that’s only fun for so long. Eventually, homegirl is going to get bored with the bullshit and find a new guy to roll with. That’s just how the game works.

END OF THE LAY

At the end of the day, it’s not going to work if you’re out there trying to bag girls for all the wrong reasons. There will always be an abundance of men who honestly find females with colorful pasts endearing and charming, and thank God! No woman is perfect. We’ve all got issues with former flings and lovers, and it’s nice to know that some guys out there won’t judge us for it. Just realize that within the realm of promiscuity there are many extremes, so while I encourage you to go for it and find that sexually experienced woman of your dreams, there’s a huge difference between a free-spirited gal and a straight skank. I know men love a challenge, but certain women can’t be tamed and aren’t worth all the effort, so don’t beat yourself up if your good intentions don’t work out in the end.

Tabatha McGurr is a Brooklyn bred-writer currently residing in Bed-Stuy with her boo and dog Coco. She's been running to the Married To The Mob blog for the past six years. In her weekly column, she gives Complex readers insight into what today's young women really think about love, sex, and relationships.

See also:

Strippers and ‘Captain Save-a-Hoes’ Enjoy ‘Afternoon Delight’

Police: 'Captain Save a Ho' Arrested Again for Pushing One-Legged Man Off of Wheeled Movement Device

Save A Hoe Foundation | Facebook

Still not deterred?

Date a Stunning Stripper: How to Change What You Do and How You Act so the Girls Want to Date You, Not Just Take Your Money (Don't date hoes, just rent them!)

The Strip Club Dating Survival Guide: How To Date Any Exotic Dancer & Survive To Tell The Tale (Don't date hoes, just rent them!)

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Vampyre sex

My sexy little UTR "roommate" has modeled as a sexy undead vampire -- cosplay in our future? She's a big fan of vampyre TV, as am I. She looks remarkably like her hero BTVS.

But this time another vampire sucked her blood.

A LOT of blood

She's a trooper tho, still loved getting a big boner while making another preggie porn video (her idea).

Starting to get her trained how to lose control doggiestyle.

Too bad she stole my #1 magic bullet vibrator, and forgot to bring it with us to the hospital. And I forgot to bring my new bullet vibrator (with AAA super action!). Massive blood loss, nearly passing out from needle sticks in a racetracked arm, and a new diagnosis of diabetes. So no joy -- for neither of us, despite our best efforts (see porno below).

Dark Shadows on the horizon

On the downside (or upside?) she moved out last weekend. On the upside (or downside?) she still has my key and vibrator, I still have her food, and we made another porn video today. She should move into her own apartment next week, according to the Government.

A ho goes to the highest bidder. It’s the American way. Freedom, baby! I was always her third choice as backup for the backup, after her rich sucker she was fucking and living with kicked her out last week. "His ex was moving back in," was the excuse I got. Now she's back with her wannabe sugardaddy (who's in love with another hooker who won't have sex with him!), for a week or so, trying to get him to get her car fixed, after it was sabotaged by a previous sex-crazed sugardaddy. Queen Of The Night drama!

This was a week after she was kicked out of her white trash dream trailer park where she lived with a beerbelly wannabe-customer parked next door to her deadbeat babydaddy pimp, er, BF.

Where's Jerry Springer when you need him? (at a hohouse of course)

All this moving and freaking is in preparation for her getting her very own house of ill repute. Everyone is helping her do this, in their own way.

Or sabotaging as best they can.

"Purse first, ass last" is the motto of pimpin', the very foundation on which pimpin' is built. What separates a pimp from a trick is that a pimp completely flips the game. A trick pays a ho for the pussy, but a ho doesn't get to fuck a pimp until she pays him. A ho has got to put it in a pimp's pocket like a rocket before pimpin' can begin. It's not about a pimp breaking a ho, it's about a ho breaking herself. Violating this first law will guarantee a pimp a career of troubles and stress. If a woman can try you before she buy you, then, as B.B. King says, "The thrill is gone."
-Pimpology: The 48 Laws of the Game

There’s a lot of money at stake, for everybody involved. I got her sugarbaby contract signed, to aid her great escape. How that escape will affect our business relationship, I’ll wait and see.

A big part of the No Joy problem was/is that she is two-timin her rich sugardaddy, with me. He's trying to buy her exclusivity (or scam her), after his last doper sugarbaby scammed him for $1000s without even giving him more exclusive sex. Perhaps he’s wiser now? Her OBs and other errands lasted 8 hours, and she had a curfew, apparently, to get back to him before his midnight shift. Of course I was charged the full rate, despite my full day at her peck and call (just like a marriage, or ex-marriage, but far cheaper).

Then there's the doper BF pimp in the trailer park who says he loves her and kisses her before and after many of our "cosmotology/modeling" dates, which is her #1 choice of home (that she loves getting away from to go fuck as many sober employed men as possible).

I even get to hear her tell him "I love you" before she bangs the brains out of my little-big head (oversized in our porn videos, explaining why I get so many giggles and thank yous from the girls).

The thing is, she was a hottie little semi-rich girl before the trailer park trash got hold of her. Her MILF momho drives a new Vette. "The reason my daddy is a dick is his wife. We used to be really close." Not so much daddy issues as wifey issues. My mission impossible, should I choose to accept it, is to return her to her former modeling glory, before it's too late for her and the baby (beware the pedopimps!!!). Operation Save A Ho Fuck A Pimp. Nothing I can do about the needle marks except use photoshop. The hospital was a little shocked trying to suck her blood.

Then again, he's not the only one livin in a trailer with a criminal record (one of my several current domiciles). She discovered the latter today while doing other things she/we shouldn't have been doing. So I've been arrested slightly more times than her. Bad boy points SCORE. Trying extremely hard to prevent more badboy points, however. Been there done that. Got the photos to prove it.

But I don't want to piss off the pimp, again and again. That might not end well for somebody.

lotion

The facts of an undead life

So here I am fucking a 21-year-young nude model stripper UTR escort porn star, 30 years my junior. Shoot, I was married before she was born! She explained, "My (sugarbaby MILF) mom called the cops when she found out I was stripping. I was on stage when they came in the door. Since I was 18 there was nothing they could do. It was really embarrasing. I was the baby of the club so they were understanding." What does her dad think about all this? "Dad doesn't know what I do now." I replied, "How could he not notice? If you were my daughter, I don't think I'd have a problem with you modeling, stripping or escorting. That’s your lifestyle and career choice. A lot of the professionals I’ve met are more fun to be with and more honest than the average girl. As for drugs, moderation is the key to everything. Split the pills to avoid OD at your bodyweight." Her BF pimp is using the drugs as mind-control, the 49th rule for pimpin. If a pimp's drugs don't work, there's always strangulation sex, which she says he is fond of. Rehab never works without the Vitamin Cure, which of course is censored by all rehabs and jails for profit purposes (even too much of a good thing can kill you in an alien sex drug cult from outer space).

But sometimes you just gotta say WTF. Daughter/sister, whatever it takes.

Her new stolen vibrator will come in handy for phone sex, on those scary lonely nights she calls me while her sugardaddy is at work.... Anxiety Disorder can come in handy after all!

Yes, gentle readers, my ho is a very Bad Girl! A playa who claims she's her own pimp. I respect dat. So do 39-million other people:

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