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One Question Test.

This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally.

The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous.

Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line.
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THE SITUATION:
You are in Florida , Miami to be specific. There is chaos all around you caused by a hurricane with severe flooding. This is a flood of biblical proportions.

You are photojournalist working for a major newspaper, and you're caught in the middle of this epic disaster. The situation is nearly hopeless. You're trying to shoot career-making photos. There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing under the water. Nature is unleashing all of its destructive fury.

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THE TEST:

Suddenly you see a man in the water. He is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken down with the debris. You move closer. Somehow the man looks familiar. You suddenly realize who it is. It's George Bush! At the same time you notice that the raging waters are about to take him under forever.

You have two options: You can save the life of George Bush or you can shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of one of the world's most powerful men (in his mind, at least).
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THE QUESTION:

Here's the question, and please give an honest answer.......
"Would you select high contrast colour film, or would you go with the classic simplicity of black and white?"

Corporate Lessons

CORPORATE LESSON 1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 dollars to drop that towel."

After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she get to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?"

"It was Bob the next door neighbor" she replies.

"Great!" the husband says. "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"

Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to the credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.

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CORPORATE LESSON 2

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish."

"Me first! Me first!" says the admin. clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone.

"Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone.

"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

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CORPORATE LESSON 3

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"

The crow answered, "Sure, why not?"

So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up.

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CORPORATE LESSON 4

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree", sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."

"Well, why don't you nibble on my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story: B.S. might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

The master of the eggs


It is amazing how many eggs cand this man hold in his hand…
I think he has been practicing so much…
I think he is Chinese, or Japanese…

It Happens only in India




According to latest amended and implemented traffic rule….. the person sitting in the back seat of a two wheeler does not need to wear a Helmet... Strictly following the rules...





Ad Wars !

Nun In The Bathroom

A nun, badly needing to use to the restroom, walked into a local Hooters. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while the lights would turn off. Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers.

However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent. She walked up to the bartender, and asked, "May I please use the restroom?

The bartender replied, "OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf" Well, in that case I'll just look the other way," said the nun. So, the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant.

After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause. She went to the bartender and said, "Sir, I don't understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?"

"Well, now they know you're one of us," said the bartender, "Would you like a drink?" But, I still don't understand," said the puzzled nun.

"You see," laughed the bartender, "every time someone lifts the fig leaf on that statue, the lights go out. Now, how about that drink?"

'SAVING IS SIN, SPENDING IS VIRTUE'

'SAVING IS SIN, SPENDING IS VIRTUE'
- Jagdish N Bhagwati


Japanese save a lot. They do not spend much. Also Japan exports far more than it
imports. Has an annual trade surplus of over $100 billions. Yet Japanese
economy is considered weak, even collapsing. Americans spend, save little.
Also US import more than it exports. Has an annual trade deficit of over
$400 billion. Yet, the American economy is considered strong and trusted to
get stronger.

But where from do Americans get money to spend? They borrow from Japan,
China and even India . Virtually others save for the US to spend.
Global savings are mostly invested in US, in dollars. India itself
keeps its foreign currency assets of over $50 billions in US securities.
China has sunk over $160 billion in US securities. Japan 's stakes in US
securities is in trillions.

Result: The US has taken over $5 trillion from the world. So, as the world
saves for the US , Americans spend freely.
Today, to keep the US consumption going, that is for the US economy to work,
other countries have to remit $180 billion every quarter, which is $2
billion a day, to the US ! Otherwise the US economy would go for a six. So
will the global economy. The result will be no different if US consumers
begin consuming less.

A Chinese economist asked a neat question. Who has invested more,
US in China , or China in US? The US has invested in China
less than half of what China has invested in US. The same is the case with
India . We have invested in US over $50 billion. But the US has invested
less than $20 billion in India . Why the world is after US?

The secret lies in the American spending, that they hardly save. In fact they use their
credit cards to spend their future income. That the US spends is what makes
it attractive to export to the US . So US imports more than what it exports
year after year. The result: The world is dependent on US consumption
for its growth. By its deepening culture of consumption, the US has
habituated the world to feed on US consumption. But as the US needs money to
finance its consumption, the world provides the money. It's like a
shopkeeper providing the money to a customer so that the customer keeps
buying from the shop. If the customer will not buy, the shop won't have
business, unless the shopkeeper funds him. The US is like the lucky
customer. And the world is like the helpless shopkeeper financier. Who is
America 's biggest shopkeeper financier? Japan of course. Yet itʼs Japan
which is regarded as weak. Modern economists complain that Japanese do not
spend, so they do not grow. To force the Japanese to spend, the Japanese
government exerted it self, reduced the savings rates, even charged the
savers. Even then the Japanese did not spend (habits don't change, even with
taxes, do they?). Their traditional postal savings alone is over $1.2
trillions, about three times the Indian GDP. Thus, savings, far from being
the strength of Japan , has become its pain.

Hence, what is the lesson?
That is, a nation cannot grow unless the people spend, not save. Not just
spend, but borrow and spend. Dr. Jagdish Bhagwati, the famous Indian-born
economist in the US , told Manmohan Singh that Indians wastefully save. Ask
them to spend, on imported cars and, seriously, even on cosmetics! This will
put India on a growth curve. 'Saving is sin, and spending is virtue.' Before
you follow this neo economics, get some fools to save so that you can borrow
from them and spend.This is what US has successfully done in last few
decades.

Professor Jagdish N Bhagwati Columbia University
Department of Economics

Never say die Indian Attitude !!!!

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman for Microsoft Europe.
5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is Santa Singh an Indian (Punjabi) guy.

Bill Gates thanked all the candidates for coming and asking those who do not know JAVA program to leave.
2000 people leave the room.
Santa says to himself, 'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to lose if I stay. I'll give it a try'

Bill Gates asked the candidates who never had experience of managing more than 100 people to leave.
2000 people leave the room.
Santa says to himself ' I never managed anybody by myself but I have nothing to lose if I stay.
What can happen to me?' So he stays.

Then Bill Gates asked candidates who do not have management diplomas to leave.
500 people leave the room.
Santa says to himself, 'I left school at 15 but what have I got to lose?' So he stays in the room.

Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat to leave.
498 people leave the room. Santa says to himself, ' I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat but what do I have to lose?' So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate.

Everyone else has gone. Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only two candidates who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a conversation together in that language.' Calmly, Santa turns to the other candidate and says 'Hor Phaphe ki haal chaal?.' The other candidate answers ' O Vadiya veere, tu Sunna'

Men will always be men!!!***Hilarious***

A man boards a Jet Airways airplane Delhi to Mumbai and takes his seat.

As he settles in, he glances up and sees an extremely attractive woman
boarding the plane.

He soon realizes she's heading straight towards his seat.

Lo and behold, she takes the seat right beside his.

Eager to strike up a conversation, he asks "Business trip or vacation?"

She turns, smiles, and says, "Business. I'm going to the annual
Sexologists' Convention."

He swallows hard, thinks to himself, here is the most gorgeous woman he has
ever seen, sitting next to him, and she's a sexologist!

Struggling to contain his excitement and maintain his composure, he calmly
asks, "What's your business role at this convention?"

"Lecturer," she says, "I use my experience to debunk some of the popular
myths about sexuality."

"Really?" he says, swallowing hard. "What m-m-m-myths are those?

"Well," she explains, "one popular myth is that Negro men are the best
endowed when, in fact, it's the Sardar ji who is most likely to possess that
trait.

Another popular myth is that French men are the most sensitive lovers, when
actually it is the Bengali.

However, we have found that the best potential lover in sensuousness is the
Tamilian."

Suddenly, the woman becomes a little uncomfortable and blushes.

"I'm sorry," she says, "I shouldn't be discussing this with you. I don't
even know your name!"

" Venkatraman! " the man blurts. "Venkatraman Mukherjee! But my friends call
me Narinder Singh!"

A deserted Island.

A ship sank in high seas and the following people got stranded on a beautiful
deserted island in the middle of nowhere:

A. 2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman
B. 2 French men and 1 French woman
C. 2 German men and 1 German woman
D. 2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman
E. 2 Polish men and 1 Polish woman
F. 2 Mexican men and 1 Mexican woman
G. 2 Indian men and 1 Indian woman

What a Crazy coincidence! One month later, on various parts of the island,
the following was observed:


A. One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.

B. The two French men and the French woman are living happily together.

C. The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of when they spend time
with the German woman.

D. The two Greek men are happy together, and the Greek woman is cooking &
cleaning for them.

E. The two Polish men took a long look at the endless ocean and a long look
at the Polish woman, and they started swimming.

F. The two Mexican men are talking to all the other men on the island trying
to sell them the Mexican woman.

G. What happened to the Indians????


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The 2 Indian men are still waiting for someone to introduce them to the
Indian woman!!!!
 
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